Finding my happy place...

I've been waking up a lot at night thinking about how I need to find " happy ". Lately I felt like I don't have enough goals to make me feel alive.. and well.. happy. 
It's not that I'm un-happy. I'm just not challenging myself and getting out of my comfort zone to make me feel Great! 

I am hoping this weekends 4 mile race will give me the push I need... it's also making me feel anxious and pushing me out of my comfort zone. It's all because its hard to run fast for 4 miles. Its a love.. hate relationship with racing! I love the after feeling but hate the before feeling.. nervous and obviously painful to run with my lungs burning, legs hurting and pounding heart... 

This morning.. I opted to run on the cross ramp inside the gym for an hour..followed by 20 minutes of abs, and arm resistance training.. and also my 50 squats for the day.. I actually didn't mind being inside working out this morning. I got to read 2 magazines  watch the news and stay warm.. maybe a bit too warm.. but it was nice to not have to bundle up on this 28+F morning... Maybe I'll go run this afternoon.. when temps are back in the 40's?